When I was first learning how to control my psychic abilities, I sometimes wondered if being functional as a psychic was sort of like having a free pass, like I'd somehow be able to cheat my way through all of my life lessons through the much more expansive, high-level view I'd have of the people and events I would experience. Boy, was I wrong.
What I would later come to understand, much to my dismay, is that psychic accuracy has a number of prerequisites, the most most important of which is complete and total emotional detachment from the information being sought. This is why I will sometimes refuse to read for close friends and family members - if I'm too close to the situation, my ability to be accurate is compromised.
In my own life, the times when I most need the guidance and support that my psychic abilities allow me to access - those times when I'm in the midst of a life lesson and feel mired in fear, self-doubt, heartbreak, guilt, shame, longing, and desire - are precisely when my abilities are the least reliable.
However, cultivating emotional detachment does help, although it's a difficult skill to master.
When I was pregnant, I used to do a certain pregnancy yoga video. In the video, the narrator instructs the viewer in how to twist one's body into a pose it's not meant to do, and then to hold it. "Breathe smoothly through," he says, as though he knows everyone watching has her face twisted up and is holding her breath so as not to topple over in a heap (which was, of course, exactly what I was doing).
At that point in the video, I always laughed, both at the ridiculousness of trying to breathe calmly while all my muscles were saying "what the heck are you doing?", as well as the excellent metaphor it made for life in general: cultivating calm in the midst of strain and struggle.
Over the last several years, I have been working on "breathing smoothly through" those times when I really need my psychic abilities to work properly, and I'm happy to say I've gotten a lot better at it. It's like any other skill that can be mastered - it takes practice, practice, practice. Unfortunately, to practice becoming the calm eye of the storm, there first needs to be a storm.
For those of you learning to control your psychic abilities, give yourself permission to recognize that you don't get a free pass in Earth School just because you can communicate with your spirit guides and see the higher purpose of many of the things you're experiencing. You're here to learn and grow just like everyone else, and personal growth nearly always involves some amount of suffering.
Repeat after me: “I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.” (Quote from Little Women by Louisa May Alcott).
Oh, and then breathe smoothly through.
If you do find that you'd like a bit of help, either to confirm your own developing clarity in the face of turmoil, or to just get someone else's opinion, remember that this is why even psychics need psychics sometimes.